I really should have written yesterday. It was the 2nd anniversary of Derek's diagnosis. I call it Triple D Day. Derek's Diagnosis Day. :) I have mixed emotions about the day. I can't help but remember how painful the day was. But I'm trying to focus on the positive--how far my son has come in the past two years. It has been quite a journey. Maybe this day will get easier and easier as years go by. It's really the day my old life ended and my new life began. Two years ago autism wasn't even a blip on my radar. Now my life revolves around it. I have to remember what time therapy sessions are, think about situations and whether or not my son will be able to handle them, and prepare for meltdowns. But on the positive side, my perception has changed entirely. I don't take a single milestone for granted and I notice EVERYTHING!!! Derek sees ladybugs on flowers, hears the buzz of fluorescent lights, and feels the grass between his toes. So I do too. :) Derek is the very definition of innocence and beauty.
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This picture was taken July 17, 2009...two days after his diagnosis. I had no idea at the time how much it would come to represent. I have it hanging in the house in a frame I found that reads "The Road Ahead Lies Within." PERFECT. |
Yesterday I tried to have a "Celebration Day." I wanted to have a good day...I didn't want to dwell on the fact that it was DDD. So I loaded up the kids, took them to McDonald's (Derek didn't eat anything except the french fries, but so what???) took them to the pool, and then attempted to go to the movie theater for the first time. Well, it was actually Tyler's 2nd time, but it was Derek's 1st. COLOSSAL MISTAKE. For once, I forgot to put myself in Derek's shoes. And I wanted to kick myself in the face for it. He freaked. The movie theater was too loud, too dark, and there were too many people. I thought that once Winnie the Pooh came on the screen he'd be ok, but nope. He wanted OUT and he wanted out immediately. Poor kid. I felt terrible. I guess movies are out of the question...
On another note, the art studio is coming along GREAT!!! The French Doors are up and stained. The tile is done. The walls are painted. The trim is done and the chair rail is up. I got the plexiglass for my table. All I need to do is bevel the corners of the plexiglass and duct tape it down (so I don't slice up my forearms) and I'll be ready to get to work. That and unpack some supplies. I've been waiting 6 years for this!! Actually, I've been waiting most of my life...